My Normal

Fall break means I can finally breathe a sigh of relief. I have time to become best friends with my bed again, and I have all the world to look into my child's face and study every expression imaginable (and boy does she have many!)

I have used my time at home to be productive by keeping the house clean, having a lot of one on one time with my little one and getting in more quality time with Kylie when she is home. I am not rushing around filling water bottles, grabbing a snack and rushing them to the next activity. I can breathe.

I have made such a great head start on the girls Christmas Lists I have several things in layaway, got some stuff waiting in the cart on Amazon, and a lot of stuff in the bags in my closet. I have taken this fall break to start on those things that would normally be pushed aside because working, maintaining a house, paying bills, getting the kids ready for every activity imaginable, and trying to spend some one on one time with each is just filling up my days right now.

I have really been intentional to spend time with Madilyn. We have played many board games, worked in her preschool workbook, and colored countless pictures. I have listened to her talk about her best friends, her likes and dislikes and what she wants for Christmas. We have spent most of the days at home relaxing and enjoying each others company.

As much fun as we are having this week I know we will both be ready for school on Monday! It has  been a fun week of just lounging and not doing much, but if you know me you know I like my normal!

Here's a few things we've been doing this week:

My girls getting ready for church 

Cootie game with this cutie

My beautiful 6 year old 

Cheering at a Halloween party 

Got a new Hannah Montana movie in old school 3D 

This child and candyland 

My girls eating at burger king on family night!

The girls got their ribbons this week 

Hayride with Emory 

Kylie Jade and her best bud Ava 

Doc Operation 

Kylie Jade receiving her achievement award

Sofia the first 

Little bit is a gymnast 

I Don't Belong to You

Do you even realize how alone I feel?
Trapped,  forgotten,  broken.
So angry it's turned to bitter sadness?
Wasted so many years,  so many tears.

Wished away my youth so I could grow old with you.
Wasted, drifting,  gone.
I will never be the same me again.
I lost myself in you.

I'm done with these silly games.
The idiotic way you carry on.
Bitter because you got everything.
I was left with nothing.

Bloody knuckles,  cut up wrist,  all the rage I feel.
Dance around those empty promises.
Stare at your pathetic ghost.
You lost everything because you don't care.

I don't belong to you.

Cheer Competiton

Motherhood comes in many different forms of love. One of those loving moments for me was Kylie Jade's recent cheerleading competition. If you know me cheer has never really been my thing and I swore I would never have an athletic cheerer. Anyone who knows me knows I lacked school pep and couldn't care less about sports in general.

I enrolled Kylie Jade into gymnastics when she was a small, potty trained, 2 year old. She has always been super active and socially mature so I figured gymnastics would be a great fit for her. Dance took too much time to learn the routine, but gym was the perfect fit for her. As she learned to flip over bars before she was 3 we found that her interest has doubled. Gymnastics was her thing and once you are in gymnastics you turn to cheering.

My 5 year old daughter expressed in interest and cheer and I was hesitant. I am not big on cheering myself, but if she wanted to do it I would let her try. No harm right? Yea no harm except on my bank account...

As she began into the cheering world we realized quickly that back hand springs, and tucks were going to be a must. I, sadly, took her out of gymnastics and enrolled her into tumbling. Boy has she flourished. She has picked up back hand springs in around 7 months time and while they are not perfect they are coming along quite nice. Along with tumbling she decided she really wanted to do Rec cheerleading so off into the world of the Ringgold Tigers we went.

The first few weeks she didn't really care for it. She wanted to do more tumbling and less cheering. I figured that would happen she loves to cartwheel, and somersault away. As we broke off into groups we found that Kylie Jade was enjoying it more. The cheers were louder, her confidence soared and she was so excited to cheer on the boys.

Monday was her first cheerleading competition ever. I entered in horror as pink shirts, pink hair bows, and preppy made up faces chattered around me. Kylie Jade's eyes were lit up and she was in aw. She went right to her group and was hanging with her cheer friends. She was so excited they picked her to get to cartwheel in front of everyone. I was just sick to my stomach. I kept silently praying she wouldn't fall, she wouldn't get hurt. As they came out for the cheer portion her hands were on her hips and her smile lit up the room. "Are you ready?" "OKAY!" The girls shouted. As they began their 1,2,3,4,5 routine. Kylie Jade spoke clearly and sweetly. The smile never left her face. The crowd all cheered once they left. Next was the dance portion. I was a nervous wreck because I knew she would cry if she fell. She didn't she did fantastic. The girls were all smiling and held their own up there! She nailed her cartwheels and everyone cheered for them. They announced the winners and the girls won their CHEER and ROUTINE! They were so excited and Kylie Jade was on a winning streak high. I gotta say she is amazing. I was so proud of her and happy she was able to show off how sassy, and full of life she is. She told me in the car on the way home that "cheering is definitely my thing!" Looks like more cheer competitions are in our near future!

I gotta say those group of cheer girls are amazing! Our coaches were awesome and all those practices paid off! Congrats Ringgold Tigers team 2 YOU DID IT!

Cheer practice

My girl got her uniform

Practice one of the very first days

My sweet girl on the first day of cheer

At competition 

Sassy thing 

Love this 

At one of the games 

Check out how cute she is 

Parade

They won!! 

Parade

At one of their games 

First place!!! 

A Look Into A Busy Mom's Life

Some frown upon the business of my schedule.  Monday cheer and T-ball,  Tuesday cheer,  Wednesday gymnastics for both girls,  Thursday dance for both and the occasional tball game,  Friday cheer practice or parade or competition, Saturday cheer for football game,  Sunday church.  I have something to do most days of the week and while it is not ideal for some it is what works for us. Having two social butterflies means I got two kids who love to shine.  Providing them with any and every opportunity to do so is a must for me.  I want my girls to find their passion so they can have something they feel like working for.  I've heard many times when a child has a passion in middle and high school they are less likely to fall into the drug or alcohol trap.

I like staying busy because I can see a big part of what my girls love.  They shine,  they smile,  they absolutely love what they do.  As time has passed I see that sticking with something has really proven to be wonderful.  My 6 year old can do a pretty mean back hand spring. My 3 year old already can crank a ball when pitched to her (not every time of course!) these are things we would've missed out on had I told them no or allowed them to quit when they felt defeat.

Through all the business of my schedule I still allow room for playing,  homework,  and play dates.  Kylie spends most of her free time out on the trampoline practicing for the Olympics or flipping around on her bed trying bridges,  splits,  hand stands.  You name it. After seeing the fire burn for gymnastics we have decided to include private sessions along with her tumbling. 3 class she will be taking the next go round St gymnastics.  I have really enjoyed the stage she loves using what she learns on the floor during cheer.  She isn't afraid to throw in a cartwheel or round off. I have been blessed with a gymnast and so thankful I put her in at a young age.  She's very good for a 6 year old and I am proud to see her get out there and give it her all.

Madilyn is more low key than Kylie you can often find her in dress up high heels,  sitting on the floor building or playing with her babies and ponies. She loves to have them play on the castles they have and I can often hear her playing school or family life.  With many "mommies" and "the teacher said." She does enjoy going outside and tumbling on the trampoline like her sister.  But she is fine playing by herself making her own world.

As the school year is picking up I find that Kylie has much more homework and less time to practice or play.  We are finally settling into a very nice routine.  She plays then does some homework then plays and comes back and finishes.  I know as the grade levels become higher she will have less free time and more work to complete.  Being a hard advocate for no homework this can be sticky. Hopefully God will continue blessing us and we will just find a way for everything to be complete without her losing herself in a pile of papers.

I will end with this.  My girls mean so much to me.  I love watching their little super star personalities and enjoy giving them opportunities to shine.  I am so glad each girl has found something they love and maybe they will even want to stick out into the middle or high school years.  I am so very excited to see what is in store for them the coming years. I hope they will look back on these times and have sweet memories.  I feel like our relationships have strengthened and cannot wait to see what God has planned for us next.

Her bridge 

Tballer

Beautiful 

My dancers

Back Hand Springs 

Cheerleader

Cheer girl

Madilyn loves Tball

Catching balls with her coach

Her Tigers tball uniform

Bridge 

A letter to the Imperfect Parents.

Parents,

I know that feeling you get when you've had enough. There's no amount of shame that can compare to what I have felt. I've been guilty of yelling, telling white lies, and breaking the spirit of my children more times than I care to remember. It's times like these that we can learn from each other. Mistakes we've made over and over and over and over again that we can help smooth over for someone else.

I know what it is like to just break down in tears because you are beyond frustrated with that screaming, manipulating, pulsating toddler. I know the guilt you feel when you get a bit too angry and spank or grab a limp arm. I've been there. I've made those mistakes. I can tell you I've come out in the other side more knowledgeable, and sensible than I was in the moment.

I've said the I'm sorries, I've given treats out of guilt and I have bribed when it was the easiest thing to do. I've used fear to get my children to do what I've wanted because it was the laziest thing to do. I'm human. I make mistakes. I'm not perfect.

In the car seat world, the breastfeeding world, and the recycling world I'm considered a terrible parent. I didn't even try to breastfeed, I moved my 3 year old to a high back booster without a 5 point harness around her 3rd birthday and I didn't cloth diaper ever or recycle my formula cans. I love my girls and did what I felt was best for our situation. You may not like it. You may not agree with it. You make think I'm the worst mom on the plant or don't care about my kids. I reiterate: I'm human. I make mistakes. I'm not perfect.

My children attend school because that is the best fit for our family. I make them sit down and obey rules. They have to follow the directions set forth in our family. They are allowed to choose different activities they want to invest their time in. Many people think I'm crazy. Think I am pushing my kids too hard. Think I am making them do things for an image. I love my girls. I give them opportunities because I'm blessed and fortunate enough to be able too. I am not perfect. I make mistakes. I'm human.

We, as women, need to be holding each other up. Not tearing each other down. I'm tired of the negative posts and comments about how so and so is doing this wrong. Especially in a classroom environment. News flash if you have never taught in a classroom "volunteering", if you wanna call it that, does NOT count. We, as teachers, do the best we can with what we have. I hate the argument that I do not know my students. You would be surprised at how well I do know my students. I know what they like, what they dislike, their fears, their struggles, of their families are together or split, their passions and interests. Just because I don't hold a 45 minute conversation about what happened at this point does not mean I am not listening nor do I care. The question will be answered at the appropriate time. Because some times, in this great big world, being quiet and listening are GREAT qualities to have. If you stop letting your child question every single thing in life you may see how much they learn through listening.

If you have a very narrow minded view of something stop posting about it. Sometimes you just need to take a step back and see the picture as a whole. We are human, everyone of us makes mistakes, we are not perfect.

And no matter how perfect you may want to appear..we all know better. Especially me, because I screw up this world of parenting. All. The. Time. I hope I can one day perfect it...until then that is why they say practice makes perfect.