Sometimes I can’t help this feeling.
There’s an emptiness inside.
The memories come back to haunt me.
Tearing down the walls I’ve tried so hard to build back up.
There is this pain resurfacing and I can’t run from it any longer.
I cut my way through school.
Blew a fuse on everyone that got in my path.
I allowed my demons to take me under and I’ve begged them to let me go.
The scars on my legs make for an interesting tale.
I don’t have to tell you anything.
I’ve run through so many open doorways and hit the walls beyond.
I suppress the agonizing pain within.
It wasn’t like me to care anyway.
I drank away the memories.
Found myself puking on the bathroom floor.
This isn’t what my life was supposed to be.
Yet here I am faced with this dilemma again.
I empathize with those who wonder.
Who know how this feels.
Reminds me of the nights I’d sit on my windowsill longing to be free.
Rage swirled in the deepest parts of my soul.
Causing a ripple effect.
Poisoning those around me.
Making me feel as if I wasn’t really there.
One smell; one word; one sound can take me back to that time.
I still long to be free from these chains.
I still long for the forgiveness I’ve never received.
I yearn to find you and pick up your pieces.
I know you’re out there somewhere.
My heart will continue to be incomplete until I find you.
I will find you.
I will do my best to put you back together.
To help you understand that you aren’t alone.
I’m empty until I fulfill this longing of my soul.
I won’t stop until I find you.
I know you’re out there waiting.
There’s this emptiness inside.
