On the inside : Last Day Of Kindergarten

Isn't it supposed to get easier the older they get?
I can't shake the feeling that she is growing up and drifting away from me.
Sure, she has many more "elementary aged" years, you say...but those hello kitty colorings and snuggles before bed time will stop far too soon.
As the end of her first real school year comes to a close I find myself wrapping my arms around her so much more, and enjoying the beauty of her last days as a five year old.
Too much goes on in May for my weak heart.
Both my girls turn another year older, John and I celebrate another anniversary marking the past as the past, almost forgotten.
I can't seem to break out of this funk, and I know soon we will be back to school shopping and I will just be glad she is protected, and safe in her sweet school environment!
But how long will that last?
At some point I have to let go, and let the tears that prickle in the corners of my eyes flow and after I am done with my ugly crying I can breathe and make sense of the world again.

I was young, many would argue I was too young, but she's here, she's alive, and she is my everything.
The days past far too quickly and I see the remembrances of my little baby girl slowly fading and into a young girl she grows.
As we gain another year older and another year stronger I feel like I am racing against time.
The regrets are heavy...did I hold her enough when she was a baby? Did I give her to right tools to stand her ground? Will she fight for her beliefs and hold herself to a higher standard than the rest? But I know all too well the evils of peer pressure.

I shall say my saving graces, suck up the little bit of air I can through the sobs and smile because my baby is not so babyish anymore.

Here's to her last day of Kinergarten and her very last day of being my sweet, innocent, more than well behaved five year old!

Cheers Kylie Jade mommy is so very proud of who you are becoming.